The last I have blogged was the 27th of December 2002. Hmm ... Today is the 26th of January 2003. It's been nearly a month since I blogged ! It's also another new year. Funny, although New Year's was like a month ago and Chinese New Year is 1 week's away, tonite feels like the eve of a new year.
People rely on calendars to keep track of new years eve me I would rather depend on my inner feel. Tonite feels like new year's eve to me. The quietness of the night and the fuzzy feeling I have inside, the feeling of secureness are all those feelings I used to feel together with mom,dad and sis all those wonderful new year's eve together. Although tonite I just sit at this terminal all alone with my sorcerer box, that same feeling is there. I just can't explain that feeling. To me it's like the feeling I feel when I am in a car listening to the millions of pellets of rain shooting the car during a thunderstorm or hiding under the blanket when it's really cold or looking and thinking back at that 10 km run you just finished when you are sitting on top of that big rock at the end of third bay. It's just a wonderful feeling of hope plus achievement ( although sometimes I haven't really achieved anything ) .. a feeling of tranquility that assures me that no matter what happens after this I can face it ... a feeling of calmness that envelopes my whole being and although I know it's fleeting I just have got to enjoy it while it last. I don't know what it is .... endorphines, the caffine from the chinese tea what ever it is ... I would pay a million bucks to feel like this every single minute of the day ...
